Hi there. Long time, no talk. Has it really been a year? I hope you’ve been well. I’m sure this seems pretty off the wall coming back for this. Why now? What have I been up to? Well, I’m going to answer that, address the current news, share some truths about fandom/the biz, and make my own announcements. It’s the tell-all you don’t want to miss. So without any delay, here we go for one more ride!
A Much-Needed Hiatus
Let’s wind the clocks back a year ago. I was juggling my new job at a certain big online entertainment news site and an active fangirl life that I had grown accustomed to during the past two years. I was struggling to keep up with my Theory Thursday posts. I found myself on the fan account less and less. If I’m honest which is the point of this whole thing Season 5 was making it very hard to stay as motivated to keep up the blog. I was getting burned out, so after the S5 finale I decided to just enjoy the summer hiatus. And boy did I! Lots of memories made through various travels and adventures. SDCC was a blast; I got to chat with Jennifer Morrison about her new film “Sun Dogs;” I met more people from the fandom a few of them becoming new friends of mine… what more could you want?! How about a longer hiatus?
After a summer of fun, I started to dread the beginning of S6. I’ve never experienced this type of trepidation over a TV show before. Remember, this is my favorite show. Why on earth would I be feeling this?! It came down to a simple reason: I got tired. Tired of staying attached to my Twitter to keep up with the latest news. Tired of watching people idolize characters and a show to the point of letting their emotions flip based on anything that happened online (hate, spoiler news, BTS pics, the works). Tired of being spread too thin when I really want to be the best at my job, a place where I could really create a career for myself in this crazy industry. Trust me, it’s crazy but I’ll explain why a little bit later. Because of this, I made a decision. I backed off from the blog and became less active on the fan account
not that many of you noticed. It’s fine if you are reading this and didn’t know that I wasn’t really around anymore. I’m not big enough in fandom to create ripples. All this to say, I backed off and it felt great. However, it wasn’t enough.
Most of you know that I also write episode reviews of OUAT for a website. I have been doing this something for almost three years. To give a brief history lesson, this blog was born and then about a week later I got started as a contributor for this particular site. It’s given me the greatest opportunity to A) be able to put into the words my thoughts on an episode, B) lend my talents to fandom and join an incredible community of online writers, and C) give me the confidence to pursue my dreams and get to where I am today. Writing reviews about OUAT has really been a life-changing experience for me. That’s why it is hard to admit that over the course of this year, writing reviews hasn’t given me the same level of happiness it used to. Maybe it was because my interest level in the show had decreased; maybe it was from frustration, believing these reviews weren’t my absolute best work. Maybe it’s both of these reasons plus something more.
To sum it up, I am tired. I’ve had my fun fan experiences (going to cons, meeting the actors, roadtripping to SDCC and Vancouver to go to set in a few days, etc). The show has been winding down towards some kind of conclusion. With just this alone, I was ready to say my goodbye to OUAT and the fandom at the end of Season 6 regardless of renewal, cancellation, XY and Z. Now with the official news of Jennifer Morrison and most of the original cast leaving and the show getting a Season 7 reset renewal, I know that this is the right time for me to make my exit.
Before I say adieu to this unique fandom, allow me to share with all of you some insight into the machine of Hollywood. I mentioned earlier how crazy the industry is. Well allow me to illuminate you on an area you think you know
but you have no idea.
Over the years thanks to how informed this fandom is, I have connected with some reliable sources who gave me set visit info. Most of us on here do. However, that amplified when I started my new job. A good chunk of my job is having access to red carpet interviews, junkets, and, usually for OUAT, sneak peeks. Because of my in-depth knowledge of the show, I was consulted for title suggestions for articles, questions to ask in interviews, and different angles to work each OUAT article. This in turn would give me access to top-secret info about the show. YES, I did know that Jennifer Morrison, Ginnifer Goodwin, and Josh Dallas were leaving the show for quite some time. YES, I knew about the wedding as they were filming it: the dress, the vows, the reception, who was there for it, the works. NO, I did not know if the show was going to get renewed or not. I didn’t know everything, and I still don’t. That’s fine by me. BUT there is a major con to this whole arrangement. Here’s the truth: many people in the media do NOT keep up with most shows unless they have interviews and articles planned.
Yeah kids, it’s that bad.
Unfortunately, that is the nature of the beast in this industry: exclusive information is power. You see this bleed out into our own fandom. Most of the “top” accounts in fandom are the ones who hold the most information, whether they visit set, have friends who work on set, or better yet, are followed/friends with members of the cast/crew. Not all, but there are some of these accounts who lord their secrets over, dangling them to tempt others to buy into their “importance.” For those who visit set frequently, there’s a toxic hierarchy and sense of entitlement. It’s not everyone, but you definitely feel it there. The one and only time I went to set in Steveston during filming, one fan who is a set regular told me that the regulars deserve special treatment over other fans who come by. This fan told me this literally after I had drove up the entire West Coast to come seeing filming of my favorite show. Not cool bro. This has to change.
Ok I’m not here to tear apart the industry nor am I here proclaiming to be above the system. I work in it every day but I’m not blind. I just want to share some truth and insight to how some of this game works. It’s not pretty, but it’s not all horrible either. Maybe we just need to change the current narrative on how we spread news as well as change the value we place on the people spreading it.
My Final Thoughts
Confession: I didn’t think I would be writing this.
I’ve been staring at this for a couple of days now. I didn’t think that the end would come like this. But here we are. This is where I take my bow. I will watch the season finale, write my review, say some goodbyes, then I’m out. Not sure at the moment if the account will deactivate; regardless, it will become a ghost town.
For those in fandom sticking around for the S7 reset, I have nothing but love for all of you, and I hope this show continues to bring you joy. I don’t want to bring anyone down for not having that same level of excitement as everyone else. So I’m stepping back to prevent raining on everyone’s parade. Just promise me you won’t lose sight on the life around you outside of the online world. I’ll miss so many of you! Keep the hope alive!
To the entire fandom, thank you for everything! It’s been amazing most of the time, it’s been rough some other weeks (even some hiatuses), but I’ll never regret the ride. This online community has taught me how to navigate through the hate to find some authentic friends. You’ve helped expose the idols in my life and how it can distort my view on life if I let it. Above all, the Oncer fandom has given me the safe space to let my love & enthusiasm run rampant and be welcomed into a community unlike any other. So from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU ONCERS!
To the fellowship of OUAT review writers, I looked up to all of you for so long. Just a novice, you welcomed me in with open arms, encouraged me when I didn’t see the best in my writing, and challenged me to push the boundaries and create my own unique voice. It was a privilege to write alongside you gifted ladies and read your elegant words analyze a show we love. I will always be a fan of your work and I can’t wait to read more of what you have. And hey, I’m not out of the writing game for good. Maybe you’ll see some new stuff in the future.
To the friends I’ve made on here, you kept me here as long as I have. Thank you for the laughs and the fun. Thank you showing me the love that can come out of this crazy fandom. Thank you for reading my insane theories and letting me fangirl with you. Thank you for sharing your lives with me, and I with you. Who can say I’ve been changed for the better, but because I know you I’ve been changed for good.
Thank you Wicked! Here’s to a new chapter of a beautiful friendship.
Last and definitely not least, to the crew, the cast, the writers, A&E, and Once Upon A Time: you have changed my life. Not exaggerating. I think most of us online share this sentiment. Together, all of you have brought to life a fantasy show that stirs our imagination and instills hope. It’s magical escapism at its best. I can’t thank you enough for inspiring me to pursue my dreams. Thank you for the love you’ve shown the fans. Thank you for telling stories and continuing to share them. I’m very thankful all of you are employed and working please don’t mistake me leaving for I want all of you unemployed, that’s just awful! All great stories must come to an end; I hope you discover that ending naturally with they new story you will begin to tell. Plus, I can’t wait to see what other projects are on the horizon for the cast that’s saying goodbye, the directors, writers, Mark Isham and his team, everyone who has been a part of this amazing show. Seriously, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for the most incredible six years. You will always hold a special place in my heart… you are a part of my story.
The chills are coming and the tears are ready to fall.
Well, I guess that’s it. Thank you for reading along with this, as well as my other posts, tweets, and ramblings. Until we meet again, I send you nothing but love and gratitude.